Myrna wrote: I heard about the early morning call from all but you.
Eric wrote: No one called me. I'm not sick, it is the time to sell dead animals to people who do not know how to cook. I'm tired of telling them how to cook. Egads man google it! Now they can argue amongst themselves as to why it did not look like the turkey hack they saw on you-tube, it's the one after opening a car door with a tennis ball with a hole drilled in it, and before the car battery hack with four thousand AAA batteries inside. They look at each other with so much anger over a ruined Holiday that the blood is going to shoot out of there eyes at any moment now. Veins bulging out of their foreheads why didn't we just ask the butcher? They wouldn't have followed my directions anyway, how come, because they don't write them down! Duh! So from me all they get is a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. Besides, I touched their raw meat with my Bare fingers! Na Na Na Na Na Na! I then wipe it on my smock, as I go to shake their hand, to tell them how to cook meat. but alas it is to no avail, they have learned nothing. History is doomed to repeat it's self every Holiday season. Just so everybody knows, a fresh uncooked ham is just a raw pig leg, so in other words it is not a ham at all, just a pig leg without the cure, not the band, but a salt or sugar and sometimes both brine then a good smoking, which is what I think they, the members, have all been doing any way. I have a great sign from my gunsmiths door, "Due to the lack of planning on your part does not necessitate an emergence on my part". One more thing, hen turkeys do not have bigger breast meat than toms, once they are all gutted out and plucked the only way they can tell the difference is the weight, hens are up to fifteen lbs., toms go up from there. Yes, hen turkeys have smaller bones than toms, just like Humming birds have smaller bones than a Condor, size proportionate.
love all of you.
E.Myrna wrote: Is there a You-Tube (such as http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ljY0mXuaRE) you are referring us to? Turkey Frier
Melanie wrote: Yes, I learned from my mother, so I don't ask our meat cutter. He seems so frustrated whenever I see him talking to the older people where I shop. I often chuckle to myself imagining it to be Eric. However, when I did ask them to cut a chicken up into a "fryer" because our store no longer sells "fryer" cut chickens, I was disappointed in the fact that all they did was flay the chicken. I could have done that without the extra dollar it cost for the cut. I now cut my own chickens.
Love you Eric!
Mel
AnnMarie wrote: Ok, so I am just now getting to my emails on the home computer. This is the funniest thing I have read all day. I now have a new phrase for people who ask me asinine questions. (And it happens to me all the time, for example, "Does this mean I'm going to jail?" as they are being handcuffed and led out of the courtroom.). I will simply reply, "Egads, man, Google it!"
Love,
Ams (A fellow bare-hands raw-meat toucher who never asks a butcher how to cook meat because of a fear of sharp sticks and poked eyeballs.)
Myrna wrote: By-the-way, Eric, yes, they did call you. You didn't answer. See messages. We then thought that AnnMarie would certainly have gotten your one call. Love, M
