Shawn Trauntvein Comments

I know that I appreciate even small things, even things that others might think could have been DI’d or so forth. Grandchildren too often like something that they know was their grandparents. I remember going though Grandma Smith’s button cans and admiring the buttons when I was a child. I also got a pen that had belonged to Grandpa Trauntvein so many years ago, but now that I am older I regret that I asked Grandma for it at that time, and that I wasn’t more considerate of her feelings and needs following the funeral. I feel now as though I had ransacked her house (somewhat akin to plundering an archeological site), since she obviously was more closely connected with him than was I. I became ashamed of that as I grew older, although I never thought of it when talking with her, or I would have asked for her forgiveness. That is one of the many things I will still want to ask her forgiveness of if I am able to see her when I pass from this life. But returning to the subject, though I haven’t figured out what I did with the pen when I went on my mission, I still remember it (maybe it is in with my jamboree souvenirs, I’ll have to look). I know that recently I got something that was considered by someone else as nearly worthless, and was bound for the DI or trash. And, as embarrassing as it is to admit, I know that Melanie sent me a check for my birthday once, which I forgot to cash for too long. But I carried it around in my wallet for years as a reminder of how thoughtful she was. I have kept some things that David gave me for a birthday when I was in college many years ago. I have other things that others of you have given us, so the list goes on. Of course, my children would have no idea why I hang on to a plastic cup with pictures of antique automobiles on the side. There is often a longing in each of us for those things, physical or otherwise, that tie us to those whom we love.

But the physical things are perishable, and will be exhausted as the number of descendents multiply over the years. Although I want to know that things that remain will be well taken care of where at all possible (remembering it may be slightly out of our control as I learned from an elderly brother from our ward whose home was damaged by the Teton flood so many years ago), it is the pictures and stories that we can pass down to an unlimited amount of our descendents. So copies of these are always so vital. I think of Mom and her longing for anything, any picture of, or and tidbit that belonged to her mother who died when she was but an infant. Maybe that is one reason she didn’t ever want us to lose buttons from the button can, because she knew some might have belonged to her mother. Perhaps she even knew which ones. Fortunately we have been taught of the spirit of Elijah, and are wise enough to be aware that the longing that the Lord has put in us, of turning our hearts to the fathers, can (as many blessings) be used by Satan and combined with greed or pride, to turn to the hurt of others, similar to the story cited. As long as we communicate and share, we will come through all the better. The thing that is more important is that we come through making sure we care for the feelings of each other, and forgive if we somehow feel offended. But in the end, on this or any other subject, if I am a cause of offense, rather than feel that you are first required to forgive me, please talk to me first, hopefully you won’t feel you still need to forgive me when we are done. If I have learned anything of love and regret, it is that we become more astutely aware of both as we age, and all of the middle ground seems to fade.