HILARIOUS CHURCH LADIES ARE BACK! (From David)‏

Myrna wrote: Thanks, David. Hehehe! I guess you remember those days when I typed the ward bulletin. Did some of these come from then? ;)

Julie's Bishop stood up to make the announcements and then announced the opening hymn. At the end, he said, "We will now all sin together." (He meant sing.) Julie said that one of the sister's still hadn't recovered halfway through the meeting. She had her head down and her shoulders kept shaking.

Sent from my David's HTC Touch Pro2 on the Now Network from Sprint®.

David wrote: 

On the lighter side.

Church Ladies With typewriters . . .

They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
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The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.
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Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
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Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow..
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered..
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM . All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please use the back door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM . The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
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The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'

Melanie Mouse's Valentine

Gordon Smith wrote: Dear Friends,  This is a story I loved to share with the children at school at Valentine’s time.  Please take a minute (or five) and share it with your family. We wish you a

your family.  We wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day!!!!    Let us know how you liked the nibble and chew story of Melanie Mouse’s Valentine.

 

Love Gordon and Roberta Smith

Valentine Story

This is a neat story that the children all enjoy each year.  As you read the story, you tear a heart as you read the part about the mouse nibbling and chewing.  You will need a large piece of paper (9x12) and fold it in half horizontally.  The first heart will need to be a big one to have space to make the other hearts in the story.  It is a good idea to practice on this before you do it with the kids.  You can glue the last heart for Melanie Mouse on a large, white paper or paper doily.

Melanie Mouse's Valentine

One morning, just before Valentine's Day, Melanie Mouse was sweeping her porch when a large piece of red paper blew past her.  She ran after it.  "This will make a fine valentine to decorate my home," she thought as she carried the paper to her house.  Once inside, she set to work making her valentine.  She carefully folded it exactly in half, then she nibbled and chewed, chewed and nibbled, until she created a big, red heart. 

"This would make a lovely valentine for Mr. Bear," she thought as she admired the heart.  "It is very large, just like he is.  It would brighten up the old, dark cave he lives in.  But this is all the paper I have.' 

She scratched her head with her little mouse claws, then she smiled.  She had an idea.  She took the heart, folded it, then nibbled and chewed, chewed and nibbled.  When she finished, she had made a smaller heart from the middle of Mr. Bear's valentine.  "Now I have a big heart for Mr. Bear and a smaller heart for me."  She was about to hang her valentine on a wall when she thought of Rabbit.   

"This smaller heart would be perfect for Rabbit," Melanie said aloud.  "He lives in the hole in the garden, all by himself.  But I would like a valentine, too.  Maybe I can make a heart for Rabbit and for me."

Melanie Mouse folded the heart and nibbled and chewed, chewed and nibbled until she had a smaller heart cut from the other.  "Now I have two hearts -- a valentine for Rabbit and a smaller heart for me.

But, just as she was about to hang up her heart, she thought of Robin.  "Mrs. Robin wakes me each morning with her lovely singing.  I would like her to have this valentine.  Perhaps I can still make a smaller one for me."  Melanie folded her heart and nibbled and chewed, chewed and nibbled until she had two hearts.  As she was finishing, there was a knock on her door.  When Melanie opened it, there stood Mo Mouse with big, wet tears soaking his furry cheeks.  "Why Mo Mouse, what's the matter?" she asked as she brought him inside.

"Oh, Auntie, I haven't gotten a single valentine.  And, all my friends have!"  Mo cried!  Melanie put her arm around M, then sat him in a big, cozy chair.  "I have a valentine just for you.  It's the perfect size for a little mouse," said Melanie as she gave him her valentine.  The little mouse-sized heart made Mo smile.  He thanked her with a hug and skipped off to show his friends.  Melanie gave a soft sigh...She was glad she made Mo happy, but she wanted a valentine to decorate her house. Then she had a wonderful idea.  She could have a valentine after all!  She picked up the scrap of paper from which Mr. Bear's heart had been cut and glue a fancy white doily behind it.  It was a beautiful special valentine all her own.  And, it looked just perfect on her wall. 

Myrna wrote: How fun and a good moral--sharing is a good thing! I am sharing this with all my family and with all of my neighborhood kids. Thanks!

Gordon wrote: You are welcome!

Have a happy Valentine’s Day!

Love, Gordon and Roberta

http://www.kinderteacher.com/ValentineStory.htm

 

Addresses are corrected on this copy. You might want to keep it because it may never be this right again!

Shawn and Kimberly Trauntvein (Brigitta, Dane, Toren, Sorina)
1937 North 1690 West
Layton, UT    84041

Todd and Amy G. Trauntvein (Michael, Tyler, Emily, Hailey)
78 Weeping Willow Run Rd.
Johnstown, OH    43031

Eric and Amy J Trauntvein (Jason, David, Madilyn, A.J.)
358 West 1240 South
Payson, UT, 84651

David and Arbree Trauntvein (Erin, Donovin, Caydin)
6350 Deer Rd., #253
ElPaso, TX    79924

Melanie and Howard Bolton (Siovhan, Braden, Benjamin, Mikeala)
20 Field Pond Rd.
Milford, MA   01757-1285

AnnMarie and Brandon Howard (Alyssa, Kyle, Megan, Matthew, Rachel)
1396 East 400 North
Provo, UT    84606-5119

Julie and Jim Jones (Mary, Christene, Stephanie, Baby)
11705 East 21000 North
Mt. Pleasant, UT    84647

Kirsten and Jared Waite (Whitney, Emaree, Ryan, Jacob)
339 Fox Run Circle
Colorado Springs, CO 80921

Helen Trauntvein
4842 Boyes St.
Salt Lake City, UT   84117-6222

Don and Thelma Trauntvein
1322 Sumac Dr.
Logan, UT    84321

Charlotte and Wallace Kilfoyle
5484 South Kalma Place
Bosie, ID    83716

Laurel and Tom Marinos
145 South 700 East
Price, UT     84501

Cydney and Mike Anderson
1101 South Carbon Ave.
TRLR #33
Price, Utah     84501

Garth and Alyce Childs
P.B. Box 125
Huntington, UT    84528

David and Kim Childs
6210 4th St. East
Tacoma, WA    98424

Richard's Widow
Varian and Denise Allen
P.O. Box 594
Emery, UT    84522

Myrna's Uncle
Robert and Maxine Pitts
1800 West 2250 North
Carbonville, UT 84526

Myrna's Aunt
Pat Lubbe
10557 Abisso Dr.
Las Vegas, NV    89135-2574


Siovhan Bolton
1765 Northview Blvd. #88
Eugene, OR 97405

Elder Braden Bolton
Oficina Discover
Oficina 2D
Apartado Postal 3600
Managua, Nicaragua

Aunt Eva Dixon
57 Courtyard Ln.
Centerville, UT 84014-2816

Siovhan's New Address

Melanie wrote: Siovhan moved apartments last month. Her new address is:

1765 Northview Blvd. #88
Eugene, OR 97405

I changed it on the list of addresses as well. Melanie

Myrna wrote: Is it a better situation for her? Silly question, of course it is or she would not have moved. Thanks, honey.

From Erin

Ah thx me and donovin thank you sooooooooooooooooo much tooo we hope you have a good day holiday month year good everything. we love you toooo  lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and  lots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! kissss kisssss kissssss from me and donovin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love one get love from one is the day you are invinseble to that person you share the love with and i share it with you this valentines day!!!!


this kisssis a kisss i hope to recieve


Love you lots and lots awsome to the day we willll never part luv ya!!!!!!!!!


Myrna wrote: I like your many happy and silly faces. What wonderful grandchildren I have!!!!!! You are so special and we love you lots and lots.  (Hugs and kisses!)

Tanker Competition Drawing to a Close From Al Pitts

Al wrote: All, I am amazed at the lack of interest and concern by the many people that I come in contact with regarding the Air Force New Generation Refueling Tanker. This new tanker will replace the current unit that was designed in the 1950's. Our tax dollars are being spent to finance this new product for our Nations War-Fighter. Before long, I believe, we will have this New Re-fueling tanker and it will be built in France with our tax money. I thought you might be interested in the attached information. The Foreign Consortium will be laughing all the way to the bank for the next (40) years.

I thank you for your time
al

Al Pitts
Manufacturing Engineering
Ph. (206) 544-3098
alan.r.pitts@boeing.com
M/S 4F-14

From: Sean McCormack
Dear Supporter,

On Monday, members of Boeing’s tanker team met with U.S. Air Force officials at Wright-Patterson Air Force Base in Dayton, Ohio to discuss our interim evaluation. This was our last opportunity to receive feedback from the Air Force on our proposal before the end of the tanker competition.

Based on this feedback, we’re now making final adjustments to our bid, which we’ll submit to the Air Force no later than Feb. 11. Our best-and-final offer will combine decades of tanker experience, the best aerial refueling technology and a proven Boeing airframe to best fulfill the Air Force’s requirements.

As the competition comes down to the wire, our tanker team is focused on one thing – providing the Air Force with the most capable tanker at the lowest cost to taxpayers.

In related news, the World Trade Organization, or WTO, this week issued a confidential final decision regarding the European Union’s complaint against alleged U.S. government subsidies to Boeing. Based on news reports, the ruling confirmed what we’ve known all along – the support Boeing has received pales in comparison to Airbus’ $20 billion in illegal subsidies, enough money for Airbus to develop nearly its entire lineup of commercial airplanes. These illegal subsidies have distorted competition in the aerospace industry for decades and eliminated tens of thousands of good-paying U.S. jobs. Airbus should finance airplanes the same way Boeing does – with its own money.

These subsidies also are tipping the scales unfairly in the Air Force tanker contest as the competitor’s airplane – the A330 – has received more than $5 billion in illegal subsidies from European governments while Boeing paid 100 percent for the development of the 767 aircraft. In a blog posting earlier this week, defense analyst Loren Thompson wrote, “The A330 being offered in the tanker competition wouldn’t even exist had it not been for a 40-year pattern of receiving illegal ‘launch aid.’”

While we work toward submitting our final proposal, please visit TheRealAmericanTankers.com to tell your elected officials that the Boeing NewGen Tanker is the right plane for American warfighters, taxpayers and workers.

We’ll keep you updated as we enter the home stretch of the competition, and thanks again for your continued support!

Sincerely,
Sean McCormack
www.TheRealAmericanTankers.com

Utah Snow Photos

Guy Sperry's Son Died

Myrna wrote: LuDean Sperry just called me to tell me that Guy Sperry's son was killed in an automobile accident that occurred in Salt Lake City yesterday. The boy had just returned from a mission. The funeral will be in the Salt Lake City area.


Christopher Neil Sperry Our Beloved Son On January 30, 2011, our beloved son returned to our Heavenly Father and our Savior Jesus Christ. Born February 13, 1989 in Salt Lake City to Guy Neil Sperry and Sherry Ellen Wright. He loved serving his Savior. His delight was his two years serving in the Mexico City West Mission and loved the people he served. Survived by his parents; sisters, Melissa, Erin and Lauren; grandmother, Patricia Sperry and many loving family and friends. He was greeted in heaven by his Grandpa Sperry and Grandpa and Grandma Wright. Funeral services will be held Friday, February 4, 2011 at 11:00 a.m. in the Cobble Creek 4th Ward, 8176 S. 5140 W., West Jordan. Viewing, Friday, one hour prior to services at the church and Thursday from 6-8 p.m. at Jenkins-Soffe South Valley, 1007 W South Jordan Parkway (10600 S), South Jordan. Interment West Jordan City Cemetery. Online condolences: www.jenkins-soffe.com 

Update Re Jackie Pilling

Charlotte wrote: Jackie Pilling went into a coma on Monday and died Friday afternoon.  She’s at peace now.  She’s going to be cremated and then this summer, they’ll have a memorial and spread her ashes.  Sylvia, her mother won’t go back down to St. George, but mom said she’s really sad.  She died two months after she was life-flighted to Las Vegas after passing out.

Myrna wrote: How old was she? Did she leave the hospital in that two months?


Charlotte wrote: Yes, she did leave the hospital and returned back to her home in St George.  I think she had moved to that area within the past say, 2 years or less and bought a place there?  She is my age, just 8 months older and a year ahead of me.  Markay, Wally's sister was in her grade.  Remember playing some with her when we were young, not often.  Think Dad and Mom went fishing later years with Art and Sylvia.  Art and Edna were cousins the same age.  Art died of the very same thing as Edna, just a week later.  Crazy!  Sylvia is a very nice person and well liked in the community.   Jackie was thought to have had a stroke, but turned out she had brain cancer.  I do know on face book it was difficult to watch up dates.  My friend Jeanne Smith (Ardohain)  lived near the Staleys and across from the Bryners just over the Price River west of the Pilling homes.   Sylvia and Mrs. Ardohain are dear friends.  Also, do you remember Tom Perrero?  Probably Leonard might from school.  Wally said Tom was older than Pete Perrero.  Anyway, his wife died Sunday in ICU.  She had double pneumonia and was recently being treated for anemia. She was at 85 pounds.  She is from East Carbon.  They have 2 daughters and a grand daughter.  They were living in Parker, Arizona for the winter when she took so ill.  They have there place next to where Boyd Marsing lived in Carbonville, just off the old main road from the Blue Cut.
Have you made connections with Laurel and Tom?  We still are planning our trip to the area this month for Wally and his heart check up.  Some sun today, but the weather is so cold and drab.  Think if we had more blue in the sky, our world would seem closer to Spring. Do see buds on trees.   Hope you both and all the family are well.  Julie have her little one yet?  Guess Janessa and Gus are expecting a girl anytime now.  Exciting getting new ones in the family!   Love and Kisses,   Char


Myrna wrote: Thanks for all of the information. Brain cancer is terrible as most people don't find out they have it in time to do anything about it. It is all quite sad. Leonard is asleep but I will ask him about Pete Perrero. The name does sound familiar to me. Since our 50th class reunion in June, we have had five classmates die. That is a bit scary. I guess, when you are 69-70 you can expect that some will die.

Laurel dropped me a note to say that they were planning the move a bit at a time.

It is exciting that we are getting new babies in the family, I agree. Julie isn't due until May. They have picked a name for the new little guy--Jens Luke. One of Jim's grandmothers had the maiden name of Luke. I may never be a great-grandmother. Melanie's children are the only grandchildren old enough to get married and Siovhan is enjoying her job as a television producer to much to stop working for awhile. Braden, next oldest, is on a mission. It is OK. There is time. Shawn's oldest, Brigitta, has graduated from high school and is working rather than going to college. She is still too young, I think, to get married.

One of Shawn's childhood friends just lost a son in a car accident in Salt Lake City. The boy had just returned from a mission.

Jackie Pilling

Jackie Pilling went into a coma on Monday and died Friday afternoon.  She’s at peace now.  She’s going to be cremated and then this summer, they’ll have a memorial and spread her ashes.  Sylvia, her mother won’t go back down to St. George, but mom said she’s really sad.  She died two months after she was life-flighted to Las Vegas after passing out.


Yes, she did leave the hospital after that hospital stay and returned back to her home in St George.  I think she had moved to that area within the past say, 2 years or less and bought a place there?  She is my age, just 8 months older and a year ahead of me.  Markay, Wally's sister was in her grade.  Remember playing some with her when we were young, not often.  Think Dad and Mom went fishing later years with Art and Sylvia.  Art and Edna were cousins the same age.  Art died of the very same thing as Edna, just a week later.  Crazy!  Sylvia is a very nice person and well liked in the community.   Jackie was thought to have had a stroke, but turned out she had brain cancer.  I do know on face book it was difficult to watch up dates.  My friend Jeanne Smith (Ardohain)  lived near the Staleys and across from the Bryners just over the Price River west of the Pilling homes.   Sylvia and Mrs. Ardohain are dear friends.  Also, do you remember Tom Perrero?  Probably Leonard might from school.  Wally said Tom was older than Pete Perrero.  Anyway, his wife died Sunday in ICU.  She had double pneumonia and was recently being treated for anemia. She was at 85 pounds.  She is from East Carbon.  They have 2 daughters and a grand daughter.  They were living in Parker, Arizona for the winter when she took so ill.  They have there place next to where Boyd Marsing lived in Carbonville, just off the old main road from the Blue Cut.

Have you made connections with Laurel and Tom?  We still are planning our trip to the area this month for Wally and his heart check up.  Some sun today, but the weather is so cold and drab.  Think if we had more blue in the sky, our world would seem closer to Spring. Do see buds on trees.   Hope you both and all the family are well.  Julie have her little one yet?  Guess Janessa and Gus are expecting a girl anytime now.  Exciting getting new ones in the family!   Love and Kisses,   Char